I turned 25 in November last year, a month later I moved back home with my Mum and Stepdad.
I have moved so many times throughout my life I’ve lost count (even only just to the house next door one time!). I have lived with multiple members of my family but I moved out properly when I was 23 with an ex. This took a lot of guts for me and my initial worries were proven right and that situation went horribly wrong after just a couple of months. I packed my life up and went back, head held in shame to a family members who asked no questions and was wonderful, despite not really having enough room for an extra dweller!
Following the experience of moving out I really struggled with the thought of doing it again. I couldn’t come to terms with having to haul my life somewhere else all over again and it going wrong. However, there just wasn’t enough space where I currently lived and I felt like an important aspect of life at that time was to move closer to university. A lovely friend and I moved into a flat together after our exams last year. We were so excited about having a place of our own! Everything was lovely for a while. Issues with the flat started to crop up and got a lot worse over time (which I wont go into here as it’s not the main point of this post!). But I’d work every hour possible in the summer, live in the library at uni after lectures and make sure I had plans every weekend just so I wasn’t at the flat. It was known as ‘the flat’ to my friend and I, it was never known as ‘home’. We were both miserable.
A new start
In stepped my family. They noticed how much I’d changed and how down I’d got. Being in the flat, my unhappiness was clearly ruining many other aspects of my life. It was already on the cards to move back home after I’d finished my degree in the summer of this year anyway. This would potentially enable me to find a job and save money for my future instead of spending it all on rent/bills. But in November last year the plan changed to getting me out of the flat ASAP. My friend had the same views and started hunting for a place of his own, which he found and loves it! I cannot even express the love I have for my family for getting me out of an awful situation. I’m sure parents think their time with their children at home is done when they move out the first time/go to university etc. but I’m so lucky that my mum and stepdad didn’t even think twice about me coming back and if it came to it, I think many parents would do the same.
I do live with my mum but my mum is my best friend. It’s like living with a family member, friend, yet still being able to have the space you need all wrapped into one. Some people, i’m sure can’t even imagine living at home in their 20’s and can’t understand it, that’s fine. However, there are many positives to living at home at this age and you’d be surprised how many people do it! Moving back home enables saving for something such as a deposit to become more of a reality in a time when getting yourself on the housing ladder is so hard. Don’t get me wrong I would never take advantage and live here for free, but its a lot less than renting!
Moving back home – The positives
- Potential for saving
- Spending more time with family
- Living in a beautifully clean house (my mum and I are both clean freaks!)
- We have a garden! (Massive BBQ potential!)
- Living back with our family dog ❤
- THERE’S PARKING!
- Good food (my mum used to be a chef and I’m damn lucky that she enjoys doing it, i’m an AWFUL cook!)
- A double bed! (Haven’t had one for 5 years!)
- Privacy but not loneliness (we all appreciate each others space but there’s usually someone around if you need someone!)
- Back having laughs with my Stepdad (he’s a good egg)
- Turning my bedroom into my own haven
- Having support wherever I turn
- Being HAPPY again! – The ultimate positive.
The list is endless. If i’m honest there’s only one negative about the situation and that’s the distance I have to travel to uni now, but for the sake of happiness, it’s well worth doing.
Some people look at me with pity when I say I’ve moved back home, I don’t understand this! I can’t remember the last time I was this happy, there are people that deserve their pity much more than me! Some people I tell say they wish they had done the same thing so they could have saved money better. If people judge me for it, that’s their choice, we know this is the right thing for all of us at this moment. I don’t want to outstay my welcome (despite mum saying i’m welcome as long as I need 💕) and don’t get me wrong I am so excited for the future and potentially owning my own house. But for me, for the now, this is my ultimate happiness.
If you find yourself facing the situation of moving back home in your 20’s, 30’s or older even, my advice is to embrace it! It might be due to having no choice after finishing uni, a relationship breakdown, housing situations going wrong or multiple other reasons. I know not everyone’s situation will be the same as mine at home and know i’m very lucky, but if you make the most of it there will be many positives (even if there are a few negatives).
Flying back to the nest can be as exciting and hold as many opportunities as flying the nest!